things of the night

here i am, naked in front of what will be.

let me start, it is terrifying to percieve yourself without the presence of others.
it is almost impossible to exist outside what we think others think about us!
everything i will utter is completely dictated by the fact that i am saying it at a certain time, to a certain person.
so, will you believe anything i will say?

it is completely up to you. but:

you will believe…

because we have nothing, but our ears
we have nothing but our days
we have nothing but the filthy breath of others down our necks
we have nothing but words to connect between what’s floating in my head and in yours,
in other words friends, you are bound to believe what i SAY
because if you don’t you know that then, i cannot believe you, and then, you won’t be able to believe yoursleves

…you see, you already believe me, because you want to.
because before you believe me you believe i have something to say, and thus, i do.

humans cannot afford lies.

now i ask myself, what if you all started leaving, walking away? then i ask myself, what deffirence does it make?
and then i have this image of myself standing alone in an empty theater… fuck that must be sad. but, then i see myself talking, like i am doing now, and believe me, from where i am standing now, i can smell truth in every word i say folds more than if there was a living soul in there!
for those who lost me, what i am saying is this: because i am talking to you, i am bound to lie, and you are bound to believe me.

lets talk: you know i can see you.

down with the words that are said to give meaning to what holds none.
vain are the hours spent remembering what is long gone.
vain are are the hours spent imagining what is yet to come
dead are the lives lived to give meaning to words that have some.

dumb is he who wants to live forever
dumb is he who wants to live for never
clever is he who wastes no time
clever is he who finds the rhyme

when i write, the action is the destination
when we fight, the battle is liberation
death is not fearless, death can die
i’ll never be speechless, i can always cryyyyy.

it’s not my brother, not my sister , not my mother and not my dad
i’m not happy, i’m not lonely, i’m not gelouse and i’m not sad
i don’t qualify
why do you justify?
turn off the TV, turn off the radio, turn off the pc, turn on a song
i’ll tell you what’s right, i’ll tell you what’s maybe, and i’ll tell you what’s wrong.

like a man who didn’t learn how to smile yet, i listened to you as you walked away,
silently, and as natural as a withering plant,

you left.

the best thing about non deadly car accidants is you get to stay home and watch dvd’s all day without any guilt.
and you get to boss people around  on grounds of inability of movement.

i have had 4 near death experiences up to now,
doe sthat mean i will never die, since i survived the third,

or that i am already dead?